Lost?!?!

Today solidifies the loss I have thought would never come, but you have just given me that complete affirmation! Not sure where you went, but I know about when. You reach out often, but is it for help? NO! You have gone from thinking of others to thinking about yourself and your next fix. You wanted the things you have been given, all your life and all you do is destroy it every day inch by inch. How can you live the way you are living? You know you are not happy, yet you continue to strive for what you think is more, yet it is soo much less then I would ever think of you wanting. All that matters to you is who you can use or convince to help with your fix. What happen to YOU? You try to blame it on the worldly things and your past, but to me a person who has all you have would strive to be better and want better than the life you have lived.
I cannot believe the things we have been through together and you write me off as if I was the gum on your shoe. I miss our times together. I miss YOU, the OLD you not the one I have become to know in the past 10 years. I am at a loss with the person you have chose to become. You complain about no one there for you, yet the one person who is there for you through the good and bad you have discarded. I have tried for the last time to get through to you. I am done, there will be no more trying, no more texting, emails, calls....NOTHING!
You have hurt me for the LAST time!! When you need something don't call me, as I will not answer. I will not write. I will no longer respond to you as I am done. All I can do is cry and hurt for you and will not forget, but as you have put me behind you for the last time, I can't hold on to the want of it all anymore. I am so hurt I am really at a loss for the words I need to express in order to get this off my chest. Please take care of yourself and know I love you, but obviously YOU have chosen to place me as an expendable in your life. TTFG *sigh*